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Supreme Court Absolves Enron Executives
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| FCC Votes to Hand Airwaves to Rupert Murdoch's News Corp.
WASHINGTON, D.C. - On June 2nd, the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) voted 3-2 to hand over the nation's airwaves to Rupert Murdoch and his News Corp, something critics claim might possibly create some minor changes in the news and information available to Americans, such as saturating the media with 24-hours of Bill O’Reilly. Citing the proliferation of alternative Worldwide Media Domains (WMD) in cable channels and the Internet, and comparing it to the Biblical scourge of locusts, FCC Chairman Michael Powell said the airwaves, as well as America's democracy and freedom of choice, are only safe in the hands of a strong, dedicated, and ethical leader.
The FCC's review process, Chairman Powell explained, was a model of inclusive democracy, which took his staff on over 2,500 fact-finding trips. Asked whether the bill for these trips, totaling some $2.8 million, was not all footed by corporate media, Powell quickly retorted: “So-called media watchdogs and citizen groups could have come up with their own money if they wanted our ear--the fact that they didn't makes it clear that they were satisfied with our methods and progress.”
Further criticism of the FCC, which also chose to change the words of its name (keeping the same initials) to Fox Channel Cheerleaders, came from over half a million citizens who wrote, called, and e-mailed in opposition to the consolidation changes. Asked if completely disregarding such a public response was undemocratic, Powell said: “The public response just goes to show how dangerously wrong focus groups can be.” Then he added: “If you remember, President Bush was elected by five votes. I think we had at least five e-mails in favor of rendering onto Mr. Murdoch what Mr. Murdoch is due… Come to think of it, they might have been written by the same five Supreme Court Judges.”
In fact, Michael Powell and George W. Bush share more than a healthy approach to democracy. Both men's ascensions to positions of leadership were completely unrelated to their powerful fathers (General Colin Powell and George H.W. Bush). More importantly, they follow a similar, successful business model. President Bush--a stunning businessman who managed to make millions of dollars from business failure after business failure--wisely distributed the wealth this country has (and much it does not have) among the upper economic echelons; Michael Powell wisely handed the public airwaves, valued at several billion dollars, to a man who is comfortable with those kinds of figures. The result, said Powell, echoing presidential rhetoric, is a substantial benefit to all Americans. “Polls show that name-brand recognition is at some 50% of potential,” decried the FCC's chairman. “Perhaps more importantly, recent anti-war protests in our country showed millions of unhappy people. Consolidating media under Rupert will not only ensure that consumers know and love name brand products, but it will make all that unhappiness go away.”
Despite such compelling arguments, critics used their last days of access to the nation's airwaves to point out that study after study shows that media consolidation makes for less diversity, less local content, and a less accurate picture of the world. “It's as if these people never heard of economies of scale,” responded media expert and previous FCC staffer Max E. Mumsliesze. “When News Corp. runs the national media, it will be able to consolidate all its staff into one employee at the Kansas office. Local news will be enhanced when content is provided by corporate press releases and when semi-literate local beat reporters are replaced by sleek, articulate PR men trained at the Goebbels School of Information Dissemination.”
In recent testimony to the FCC, Rupert Murdoch took the diversity issue head on, showing how it thrives in his organization: “Fox, for instance, is extremely representative. If you've ever watched Cops, you will know that the show features a disproportionate amount of minorities, primarily Negroids, like yourself Mr. Chairman. I also think no other TV network has a long-standing, prime-time show like the Simpsons that features a whole cast of our yellow brothers and sisters. And I probably don't need to tell you about how much Fox hires and values babes.”
The race and sex argument seemed to resonate with Powell, who noted after the FCC vote that unlike the two white, male dissident commissioners who wanted to stop consolidation, the three who enthusiastically voted in Murdoch's favor included one Feminine American and one African American. As for the choice of News Corp. over other media giants, Powell replied: “Well, Fox certainly has the most attractive talent in news,” adding that the Commission included a provision for the corporation to hire some young, attractive African American women to underscore its commitment to diversity
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FCC Chairman Michael Powell (right) and Commissioner Kathleen Abernathy are captivated by Rupert Murdoch's testimony.
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